Mean streets

Out here on the streets, man, you gotta stand up for yourself. If someone wants to fight, you gotta fight. The trick though is figuring out how to never be that bird.

Fighting's for losers.

Just enough parrot

Life's good. Got all my bird stuff down here.

Too many parrots

I got 99 problems and too many parrots is but one of them.

Birdnet

Where the discerning hawk goes online for a little H & A.

Too Cool for a Murder

Jimmy Crow prefers the company of people. The food's easy, the toy's plentiful, and Jimmy's always the coolest dressed crow in town.

To hell with the Murder, man.

Sins of our Mothers

Fact: Birds raised in cigarette butt nests are 78% more likely to smoke as adult birds.

Home is where you make it

Fun fact to know and share: Birds that build nests using cigarette butts have much healthier chicks. The reason being lack of parasites, as no mite or tick dares cross the chemical monstrosity that is butt nest.

Does it hurt the birds? Studies so far say not at all, but the opposite - cigarettes help birds live healthier lives.

White Forest

I worry about the birds out in the forest. What do they do? How do they stay warm? Poor little birds.

All the poor little creatures out in the snow.

Dinolution

Science ruins everything, right? WRONG! Science makes everything awesome. Fur example, a large percentage (not all) of dinosaurs are now thought to have had feathers. Even the mighty T-Rex:

Stylish, fashionable, warm, and not remotely related to flight. Science thinks, for now, that feathers first evolved for warmth, and later evolved for use in flight. This evolution was carried forward by dinosaurs, who ultimately became birds.

Birds are the evolution of one branch of dinosaurs. All of them. Think of that the next time you feed the ducks.

QUACK!

Never Forget IX - Cyber 9 Edition!

One's dedication to an ideal can be measured by the amount of flair one is prepared to engage. How much flair do you wear?

You can tell they love America by the masks. And guns.

No one ever thinks they are evil, right? It's always the Other guy.

All is forgiven, loser

I can't cast a stone - I don't know anyone who can. So who out there is throwing stones? Let's ask some questions!

Even more cat stuff for-from the Internet

Ceiling Cat and Basement Cat wage their eternal battle, but what of Fridge Cat? And look at all that beer!

Yo, Pussy. Or Ms. Tabby, if you're nasty. I heard the Intertubes likes cat stuff. So here's some more cool cat stuff for your cat approval.

You ever see a picture of a cat being held by monkey wherein the cat is not totally chill? Exactly. Think about it.

Cats love all life equally, except for things slightly larger than them, and everything smaller. Then it's claws of death.

Not a shop. Cats are natural born killers and are on a genocide campaign across the world against birds. And bugs.

And rodents and bunnies and chipmunks and like I said, everything smaller or just about the same size. They're the terminators of the mammal world - all cats. Like land sharks.

Can you imagine a Catnado? We'd all be crying blood, if not already bleeding out entirely.

Cats! The frisky, fuzzy, purring widdle fluffballs of DEATH.

Wonder, Woman

Here's one of the first sketches of Wonder Woman, who premiered in comic form in December 1941. It being December of 1941, she was of course fighting for Truth, Justice, and the American Way, even though she was an Amazon. Go figure! Did you know the non-fictional home of the Amazons was Bulgaria, along the Black Sea? Not very exotic.

But maybe this will do.

Or maybe this?

But definitely not this. Note the loss of the Eagle as the costume evolved. Also note that the Romans of yore used the Eagle as their standard - no coincidence, of course.

Music to

I have no idea what such music might sound like, and now I don't want to know. I'll fancy a world of the Night Pastor and his Seven Friends cooing and making... bread noises? Such strange imaginings. And to lure? Is the Good Pastor capturing these pigeons? For what nefarious and/or sonorous purpose, one wonders?

Speaking of nefarious,

It's a real thing, apparently. Look!

Surely, no internet wag went to the trouble of printing a CD label? More proof:

You start the CD the same moment the Windows 98 setup screen loads. Fucking mind blowing!

Seals out of place

Seal's like, "WTF?!" Kinda sad but also uplifting story of a zoo that flooded this Summer in Minnesota. Read about it here. This seal was found a couple of blocks away from the zoo. How messed up is that, for the seal? Going from a water world to the cold hard, wet streets? Damn. Be advised, freak events like this (10+ inches of rain in short order) will become more and more common as our world climate gets ever warmer. But hey! It's sunny today! Why worry about LIBERAL LIES?

Republican crasher seal sayz "DRILL HERE, DRILL NOW!"

How to: Owl Art

As you can see, it's quite simple. Most people can't draw detailed, beautiful owls because they don't start with the circles. Pre-circles are the key to all realistic portrayals of owls in ink or paint. Or so I've heard on the Internet.

How to make an IKEA owl. Only 3 tools needed! Setup time in minutes (thousands of them)!

Family is what you make it

Or, longer.

This appears to be an adult cat suckling or pseudo-suckling three Ryan Goslings (he's a thing, right? Mary Hartman help me!).

Proving that the mother instinct overrides the predator instinct. Which makes sense - the mother instinct comes from the oldest mammal relative. It's one of the mammalian defining features. Whereas predation is a general skill practiced by all higher level species regardless of families - the strong feed on the week.

Thus, one of the defining features of mammalian behavior is caring for the young, and not just necessarily your young. The root of compassion.

Birds exhibit many similar behaviors to mammals in the loving scale, but I suspect they're faking them all. As they all are monsters, down to the cutest of them. Don't trust birds, man.

This owl, for example, is just biding time before wrecking that gosling's life - not just by killing, but a long slow, torturous psychological undoing. Then killing. Owl's are twisted.

Geese Jam

I've actually been stuck in a goose related traffic jam. It was as frustrating as any other traffic jam - stupid fucking geese! Get out of the road you stupid fucks! I mean, ducks.

Best friends forever! Or at least for the next 2-4 weeks.

Tunnel of Love (and Bones)

The nest of the male Great Browerbird, found in Northern Australia/nearby islands. I dare say this is the most elaborate of all birds nests, though there are others worth consideration. Note the use of color and most critically, perspective - they pile up more items further away from the entrance to the next to give the illusion of greater size.
What we do for love! The male of the species spends most of the time not eating/sleeping working on his nest. There's even some mild form of training that occurs when young males will watch/assist an older male with his nest. And all for the ladies, of course. She'll come by, inspect it, and if it meets her standards, SEXY-TIME. Otherwise, she flies off to inspect other nests, and the loser bird gets to work trying again.

You see this behavior in almost all creatures that reproduce sexually - display. Competition. Seemingly over the top behaviors. It's hardwired into us, and is one of the means that evolution works its way through our various populations.

I note for consideration that it seems to me it's the males of almost every species that engages in these elaborate courtship behaviors, or even more, biological displays - consider the peacock. Whereas the females of most every species are drab and/or uninterested in any courtship displays. Except in humans. Sure, males of the species must acquire money in order to acquire a rocking Camaro in order to obtain a mate, but the females of the species go to equally great lengths in order to woo a mate - think of plucking eyebrows. Perhaps greater lengths - witness the cliched sitcom couple of the fat loser man with the plucky, hot wife.

What gives, humanity?

Spoony

Bad English or clever pirate? Ironic misspellings are a favorite of hipsters everywhere.