Redshirt's Lament 1999th Post Gif Spectacular!

Gosh.

1,999 posts. Where has the time gone? So many laughs, and so many gifs. Here's a bunch!

Upper body strength is a must!

See?

Although a gun compensates for upper body strength nicely.

Like maybe a fake beard could too, if you were Riker or Evil Riker.

Regardless, the lesson of the last 6 freaking years is this:

But isn't that always the lesson?

Ads from a hidden land

A real ad! From Japan, where Hollywood Big Shots are free to sell any old product in all sorts of odd ways. An Ewok-Lucas-Wookie kebab? Why not? Back in the day, no one in America (the only important country in the world, of course) would ever know. For example:

Arnold. This was not the image he portrayed in America in the 80's. What does that say about each country? 

Buy Boss! A scowling Tommy Lee Jones commands you!

Never Forget (Squirrel War Version)

As I go ever further down the hole of turning this blog into "Stormtrooper's Lament", I feel it important to remind my dear readers - and myself - where the term Stormtrooper first came from. The NAZI's. As with so many evil modern inventions. So, alas, while dressing up as a Star Wars Stormtrooper is mostly for laughs, the foundational undercurrent is disturbing - Lucas did not choose the name or look to be cute, but rather as a very direct reference to the NAZI's. That these same characters are now glorified in pop-culture should tell us that we've been crossing some lines over the past 30 years, and our entire cultural mindset has shifted - towards the Authoritarian, the Imperial, the faceless soldier doing the bidding of Evil. 

Just as, I realized, with what is occurring with the plethora of incredibly realistic war video games on the market - Call of Duty, Counterstrike, etc. While fun and engaging, they are also literally training millions of people in combat tactics and in pure (simulated) violence. There's only so much conditioning required before it becomes the norm. Couple this with the parallel developments in real warfare (robotics), and you see how easy the transition will be from "guy killing fake people on his X-Box" to "same guy, soldier, killing real people via his remotely controlled drone". And maybe he'll get to wear a cool mask while doing so. Black, of course.

The trends are grim.

Chewbacca got no medal

Rightfully, at the end of Star Wars, Luke and Han are given medals from a thankful Rebellion. However, Chewbacca, participant in all heroic acts, standing right there! Get's no medal.

Fact: Chewbacca helped Obi Wan and Luke and the plans for the Death Star escape Tatooine

Fact: Chewbacca helped rescue Princess Leia and escape the Death Star, at great risk to himself on multiple occasions.

Fact: Chewbacca co-piloted the ship which blasted Darth Vader from the Death Star trench, thereby giving Luke a free shot at the shielded exhaust port.

For all the heroic deeds leading up to the destruction of the Death Star, Chewbacca was in the center of the action and in fact a principle participant, equal in stature to Han Solo. And yet, and yet! Chewbacca got no medal.

Why? Too tall? Not a long enough sash? Or is it more likely this "Walking Carpet" was not appreciated for his efforts as an equal lifeform among equal lifeforms? I don't want to say the Rebellion was racist, for the Mon Calamari policies attest to the Rebellion's willingness to work with non-human species. But I guess Wookies don't have enough lobbyists on Coruscant. Or something.