Still America

A life goal: Take anything and everything you are comfortable with and look at it from a completely different angle. Upside down, sideways, backwards, slanted, etc. Perspective is the most important lesson.

As far as I've read, there's some debate exactly when the Americas were founded by people. Remember that all people come from Africa, according to current theory, and thus traveled to Asia and on further to the Americas. Lots of walking! Perhaps boats were far better - two rival theories hold boat travel from Africa and Japan prior to land bridge via Alaska model. Who knows if we'll ever know for sure, but with better science and evidence, perhaps we'll get even closer to the truth.

In the meantime it doesn't matter as people will make up their own stories regardless. 

Too Late

Unless everything falls apart, we'll not be agrarian again. Urbanity is humanity's future, whether here on Earth or elsewhere. Get used to it, or get weeded out of of the gene pool. The future demands folks willing to be crowded.

You can't see the stars in the city. But that's OK - we have drones.

NEEERRRRDDDSSS!!!

And so, lo! As prophesied in the thoughtful teen comedy "Revenge of the Nerds", the nerds have had their revenge.

Money was all it took. A few million and whammo! Even the geekiest nerd is swimming in babes. And as stated many times before, it's always about the babes. Facebook creator Mark Zuckerberg, has fluctuated from 21.2 BILLION dollars to today's 4.5 BILLION. Tough losses, but still enough money to buy all your bases and then some. Meh on the babe part though - hope he's got a good pre-nup.

Anywho, money. It's the lingua franca of power in today's age of police states (meaning, the police will arrest you if you kill someone - probably!). Many, many years ago, there was no police, and the means of power were physical - kill or be killed. Kill to eat, or die. Fists, rocks, fire hardened wooden spears, the list goes on. But for the majority of our existence, power was a direct, literal thing. You had it, or you didn't, and if you didn't you could die at any time. Now though, we live in far more abstract reality. Sure, war is the expression of physical power, but it's scaled way up, a different beast entirely. Money is by far the more persuasive and omnipresent tool for the expression of power. Keeps your hands soft.

Which leads to, of course, the Rise of the Nerds. Money brings power, power brings the babes, babes lead to success over generations. And so we go from this

Sincere, and probably scorned. To

Ironic, and the toast of the Internet. Get him a million bucks and he'll have a 6 foot Finnish model girlfriend.

You'll note the key here is getting a million or more dollars. Otherwise, nerd, you're on your own, and that rarely works out.

However, if for some strange and weird reason you're NOT in it for the money, then, we could all do worse than follow these wise words

Give not a fuck except for the truth and the well being of not just all humanity, but all life, yay, all of existence. Did ya know Mr. Sagan was a regular user of marijuana? It's true. Also, he commanded the awesome powers of the turtleneck like no other, before or after. Proof in a museum

Kinda looks like Starfleet uniforms circa TNG, yes? Sagan was a visionary.

Animal Memeorama '12

If all the bad shit that happens = 100, what percentage of said bad shit happens whilst the actor is drunk? 70%? 80? It's up there, for alcohol unleashes man's natural animal, and declares: Run amok!

Serious frog doesn't drink nor smoke. What he does is get things done, healthy and happy. But so boring, right? Cuz if it

Then it should be done! Is that not our genes declaring "More!"? And they run the show. So if feels good man, do it.

The collective future of animal life on earth depends on each of us pursuing our pleasure. Sex, and all attendant behaviors, which are legion. But oh noes1! Say the religious fussbodies! Sexy time is only between married turtles, otherwise it's a sin. And drinking and the Rock and/or Roll? Blasphemy! Hellfire! Yadda yadda, leave a pamphlet.

Come at me, bro

Internet memes. Wondrous little things that come from nothing and bring forth chortles and snorts, for a time, till they fade away back into the digital nothing from which they sprang. Some last longer than others, such is the way of all things. I expect longevity correlates to the degree with which the meme addresses the human condition. Closer to the bone and the more LOLS there are to be had.

What I find hilarious about this meme is the ironic mocking of the faux peacock effect - some male punk is feeling testy and gets pushy with someone else over some perceived slight. They'll raise their arms, puff their chests, tilt their heads back and strut in this position in side to side motions. It's all very bird like, and have I ever mentioned I have a "problem" wherein I view ALL human interactions as if in a nature documentary? We are animals, after all, living in nature.

The "Come at me bro" move is a genetic behavior we share with our simian sisters and no doubt goes back millions of years into our shared past. Billions maybe.

After all, it's clearly a defensive measure intended to make the possible attacker think you are bigger and more menacing prey than you might really be. Puffing up, as it were. An ancient and noble defense, but one that fails in the face of a dedicated assailant.

Not much you could do here, really, other than roll into a ball and pray to FSM that he tires/bores/frightens off. Bears can be scared off, of course, but not if they're all chargy and foamy fangy. You're screwed.

Legitimate Rape

All too real, up and down the animal kingdom. It's the genes, you see. They want to spread. At any cost. We are but machines for their bidding.

Also too, rape is never legitimate. It's an act of power over another in the most primal, violent of ways. Republicans would change this definition if they can. And they're trying.

Otzi Doodle Do

This is a meme I fully support. Incorporate as much of the ancient past as we can, as feasible, as recommended. No need for human sacrifice, but the art of our ancient grandparents is sacrosanct. Can there be anything more noble than the first displays of symbolic thought? Of the first light of humanity? Nay, says I. 

A reconstruction of Otzi, the dude who got shot by an arrow and stabbed by some knives yet managed to die up the side of the mountain, obviously fleeing. What Otzi did, who will ever know? Maybe he was a murderer. Maybe he was a hero. It's long, long in the past - circa 5500BCE. But what do the lives of that time matter today?

Spare some change?

Prodigal, Yo

The good son, visiting his ill Mother. Sweet, right? Or is this but step in "stealing Mom blind" scam? No way, right? No son would ever steal from his sick Mother?

No man would grow an actual rat tail, right? Wrong!

Truth in advertising, for sure. I once again throw out for the enterprising entrepreneur: Laser tattoo removal. Massive bucks to be had.

I'm gonna eat you!

Back from the store with the ingredients specified in the recipe: One fresh baby.

Simmer for 37 minutes.

Then into the oven to bake for 53 minutes at 376 degrees F.

Serve in burrito form or

As a taco. A delicious baby taco.


But seriously, this a is a joke! Don't eat babies. They're our future - and so dang cute!

Ugly Bags of Mostly Water

As a recent recipient of a melanoma, this pic makes me cringe. But some people can take the sun better than others - I have to now guard myself from overly bright lamps.

But it's true - we are just bags of mostly water. We are 70% water - if anything else were 70% of something, you'd say that is by far the dominant factor. Do you feel as if you are mostly water? Of course not. But it's true. Lesson: You can't always trust your common sense. Another example - does it seem like the Earth spins around the Sun, or the Sun spins around the Earth, based on your common sense? Yeah. And this is the true gift of Science - giving us the tools to reach beyond our own common sense, verily, our very senses.

Science - the systematic method of obtaining information through observation and experimentation. It allows humanity to exceed our biological limitations (senses) and perceive ever more deeply into the realities of time and space. For example - sunburns. They are literally the result of photons hitting our skin and damaging cells, causing them to "burn" as this physical impact imparts energy that heats up the target. I am in a perpetual state of awe as I learn more and more esoteric science facts but come to realize they are almost always grounded in processes we understand at a fundamental level - one object striking another. Fusion - the magic that runs this Universe - is the result of matter striking matter so often and so powerfully that it releases energy from the constituent matter in the form of electromagnetic radiation, which we ultimately see as light - which is defined as photons literally striking cells in our eye that then interpret this information as color and intensity, via our brain. Common sense is not common sense is common sense, in other words.

Also, too, remember Large Marge?

A passing resemblance.

We humans are special beyond compare, for we can perceive these High Truths of Science, while at the same time we are subject to the genetic imperatives that drive all life, everywhere (and there is life beyond this Earth, for sure. Just a matter of time before we have conclusive proof - which will happen in our lifetimes). We can, in theory, liberate ourselves from the genetic via our minds, via science, though this is exceedingly unlikely, for the genes are the drivers in most everything we do, and there's only one thing the genes want: To live on.

Sex and Mind. The two themes which define mankind. Which allows me to posit: Consider the miracle of the egg, which I recently heard described as "a way to bring the ocean with you wherever you go". And it's true - before the egg, all life had to give birth in water. After the egg, all the land was there for the taking, because the egg encases the ocean, and water is a requirement for life. For we are 70% water, after all. The rest is the dust and ashes cast off from generations of Stars that lived, swelled, and exploded, seeding the cosmos with oxygen, carbon, iron, indeed, everything we define as ourselves (not water).

Life is awesome, yeah?

Two Roads Lay

I delved deep into the vast photo archive that is my hard drive, growing ever larger by the day, searching for the next step, as this blog is an ever going series of steps, one to the next. And yay, is not this life as well? Anywho, I divined two roads, leading in different directions, each with merit and hints of providence. I pondered overlong, then realized I could go all Gordian Knot on this jam and roll with both. For all things are possible on the Tubes. RAmen.

Old lovers dug up from the sands of time. Dust and ashes is true enough, as the Bible says, since we are made up of dust and ashes from Supernova that produced the heavy elements that make up our entire world and everything on it. And assuredly we will return to this dust and ashes, just like our entire world will be reduced back to dust and ashes with the Red Giant phase of the Sun.

We are dust and ashes given life, given time to move, and think, and be, however brief.

And while we dance and sing today, consider ALL the people that lived before - like this couple, circa 30,000 BC (not this picture, just for example). A guy and and a gal in love, trying to make their way in this crazy world of saber tooth tigers and weird ass CAVEPEOPLE (Neanderthals), among many other perils. They were just like you and me, and no doubt shared many of the same hopes and dreams, however distantly removed. For you, me, all the people ever to have lived, stretching backs hundreds of thousands of years of men and women falling in love and fucking, bringing forth the next generation of people, as dictated by the genes. Sex is why we're here, and what we're here to do. Love is the engine created by evolution to foster this sweaty endeavour. And lust. And probably the desire to party, for by the party one can bring forth the sexy time sure enough.

Mathew Stafford, QB of the NFL sporting concern "Detroit Lions". Good team. Good QB. Megatron rules. But from the looks of it, frat boy jock douche. But such is the way of things, the way of the genes. Proof of fitness is guaranteed to attract the sexy time and the sexy time is all the genes ultimately care about - everything else is a means to this end: To Bed. So enjoy your time in the sun, Mathew Stafford. For time's sandpaper will find you too, as it will find us all, and grind us up into Pink Himalayan Salt. That's Knowshon Moreno above, as well. F'ing Fratboys!

Also too, how about a snake orgy?

That's some hot snake action, amirite?

Lizard Love

Dinner, then some slow dancing in the street....

Then back to the crib for some sweet Saurian love.

Reptiles can seem very foreign to us - cold, emotionless - but it's not true. They just lack a few cues we as a species are keyed on (facial expressions prime among them). But they experience most everything we experience, and have the same goals and desires: Eat, breed, live as long as possible.

All large life on this world is very closely related, and so perhaps you can see the sweeping effect of genes, played out over millions of years via the trial and error process we dub "Evolution".

We're all cousins, and this understanding should inform all your actions concerning Life.

We all Love.