In the hot seat

 

Da, warm up here by fire for bit, oh yes, that's nice, oh hi, Dmitry, you take picture? Say BEETS!

EU No More

Disney bought Lucasfilms a few years back now for a cool 4 Bill, and said they're making more Star Wars movies. I'm excited, but I'm a nerd. But not the nerdiest of the Star Wars nerds, by far. For example, I own no toys or costumes.

I do own a few books, they're fun and light and exactly what you think they are. Sci-fi fluff in the Star Wars universe.

But alas! These books created CANON - that is, the history of a fictional universe - and the nerds live in this CANNON and every word of it is truth.

So, when Disney said they were discarding all previous Star Wars CANON other than what has appeared in the films, the hard core nerds freaked out. OUTRAGE! STAR WARS IS DEAD! Really, it's hilarious.

As, above, a nerd prepares to burn some of his EU (Extended Universe - CANON) books (I'm sure he has hundreds more).  Hurts so good.

Back in the USSR

What with all the new excitement in Crimea - it's been awhile - I've been thinking fondly of Cold War's past.

Alas, it's just a comedy montage, and not really a geopolitical reality. Despite the action in the Black Sea. It is somewhat interesting, kind of.

Sochi is just down the road from the old Crimea, which is cool, right?

Obligatory Xmas Post

May your Christmas tree not catch on fire. Seriously, Christmas trees are extremely flammable so use caution all through the holiday season.

I think most people dislike Christmas, but don't want to say it. A silent majority, if you will. But the kids love it, so we all oblige.

Letting Go

I'm not sure if this is a Buddhist tradition, or an Indian tradition, but regardless, it's beautiful. Little candles that create fragile balloons which float off into the sky (probably landing and starting brush fires).

We are little candles that float in this world, for a time. This world is a little candle that floats in space, for a time. We're all just points of light, floating.

What if?

There's not enough words in the world to describe all the fucked up shit that has and will go down.

Keep Ur fires burning. Know that I burn with you, and am taking pictures.

Smile!

Life is the prize, you fool.

Logs of logic

Choose wisely or not - it matters not. Only rather your choice, one way or another.

Wood or not. Yes or no, what or why, really or rather, here we are. Some kind of reason:

Proof that the Devil loves us.

Our Friend the Atom

Let us follow the human understanding of the Atom. Ja, man?

Here's all the conditions upon the Earth. What happens to minerals exposed to such?

Primary colors.

Forever Young

Io, 4th largest moon of Sol's System. It's just a bit bigger than our Luna, yet oh so different.

For you see, Io is literally HELL in space. A moon of fire and magma, roiling land exploding, pits of burning damnation, etc. As such, the surface of Io is continually made anew, and thus has the fewest impact craters of any object save Sol itself.

This is a difference of 5 months. Huge zit out of nowhere - just before Space Prom, too.

A few other months. As you can see, in the blink of a geologic eye Io changes before us. Such is the temptation of HELL. Like Enceladus's CRYOVOLCANOES, Io's heat comes from tidal friction between Jupiter and the other large moons in the system. But the force on Io is far greater than on any other, and so it burns. I suppose one day it will be ripped apart, and then form a pretty ring. But already, Io has its ring:

Due to close proximity, Io interacts with mighty Jupiter in surprising ways. It's joined to its magnetic field, affecting the shape of that field. It creates a huge torus of plasma in a giant ring around the planet, made up of Io's atmosphere. It also dumps an enormous amount of material onto Jupiter, much of which falls at the North and South Pole, as witnessed in this Jovian aurora:

Ganymede and Europa are also bound directly to Jupiter's magnetic field, creating a loop of material exchange. As noted before, the 4th moon, Callisto, is not bound. And thus is free of the ravages of Jupiter's radiation to a great degree, and thus, our future space depot. But anyway, Io:

Some real time super massive volcano action in progress. You can see why it gives Jupiter 1 ton of material every second. Have it!

Technically, Io is the fifth moon out from Jupiter, but really is the first, since the inner 4 pale in size comparison. As do the rest of Jupiter's near 70 moons - most are irregular lumps of rock a few hundred miles wide, whereas the 4 big moons of Jupiter are all dwarf planet sized - two of them bigger than Mercury, and the other two just below. It's a mighty collection of moons, discovered way back in 1609 by Galileo. Here's how they look through an average telescope today:

From left to right: Europa, Io, Jupiter - King O' the Planets, don't ya ken - Ganymede (biggest moon) and my dear Callisto. Twas an amazing discovery, since it immediately raised a lot of questions - IF moons could orbit other planets, than we could be orbiting the Sun rather vice versa, and the Sun could in turn orbit another star, and that way lies infinity, and the opening of the human mind to something far, far bigger than himself, or Earth: The Universe. Praise be.

Tunnel of DOOM

An ice tunnel under a glacier in Greenland. Beautiful, but it presages a looming disaster. These tunnels form from meltwater, and quite efficiently drain water from the glacier. This also causes the glacier to slide far faster than normal, sliding towards the sea. The disaster scenario is as such: When enough fresh water pours into the North Atlantic, it subsumes the Gulf Stream, breaking the current. This ocean current is a major contributor to the weather of the Northern Hemisphere. It's loss would cause worldwide weather to go crazy for many, many years. Ice ages, massive floods, crushing droughts, monster hurricanes, tidal waves, tornadoes everywhere. Many, many people will die.

This is a possibility. And yet we do little to prevent it, hostage as we all are to insane Republicans. Who worry not, as they'll no doubt blame Liberals when the shit hits the fan anyway.

DOOM.

He Smoked A Lot

For many years, too many years, I used to joke: I should take up a 5 pack a day smoking habit, and then get fired from my job since I was always smoking, then sue my former employer for discrimination because I was forced to smoke away from work, and thus got nothing done. Not my fault! I am a smoker yet you do not allow me to smoke at my desk! And then, when I died of some cancer related illness, rich, my tombstone would read: Here lies Redshirt - He Smoked A Lot.

I no longer make such japes, as smoking is truly not funny. Disgusting, rather. But this bloke clearly has similar ideas to young Redshirt - how much can I smoke? I trust this is for some stupid word record or such. MOST CIGARETTES!

I quit those evil things months ago. Look at me, all high and mighty and no longer chained to a poisonous gas. I realized I'd rather delay my death, and toast the days instead.

Here's to you, skull in the upper corner. I'm sure your life long ago was awesome and so very important.

The Eternal Flame

The Zoroastrians bequeathed us many gifts, and damnations. Good v. Evil the chief among them in all regards. Before Zoroaster, everything was a more mellow shade of grey.

Here it is - a fire that has burned for over 4K years. Think of it - well before Jesus, Confucius, Buddha and L. Ron Hubbard - men have maintained this flame in the name of a God.

Word - Spring Break at the Eternal Flame.

Trip your mind in the flickering flames, yo.

Thousands and thousands of years old. Think of it - before writing existed, this flame burned...

In a sweet piece of real estate, of course.

Every Day is Captain Picard Day

You'll recall one of the few episodes of TNG that followed up on a previous episode. Picard chilling at the family vineyards after Borgification and then de-Borgification. Which should have put Jean-Luc on the sidelines/prison, instead of commanding.

Patrick Stewart with the Eternal Olympic Flame. Except it's not that eternal, not compared to the Zoroastrians. They've kept a fire going for some 4K years now, which is Hella cool.

Idol Oven

Is it an idol to a terrible god? Is it an oven? It's both! Testament to the power of Sarah and a branding hook (the glasses). Done in mocking fashion, naturally. Read here.

It sure does cook up the heathens nice and tasty, with just the right amount of brimstone. Mmm-mmm! Sacrilicious! 

And of course as a photoshop - the true artistic medium of our time. Not mine! Can you guess the reference?

A hint: Hissssssss

The Same Shape

A fire vortex. Wicked metal. And it is the vortex that repeats at all levels of our reality, from the very small to the large beyond comprehension. It is one of the, if not the, default shapes of reality. Gravity follows the vortex, and in it creates almost everything, via stars, and galaxies of stars. Here, heat rising rapidly in cooler surrounding air creates a vortex of fire whirling up the compressed space, as with all things: Imbalances creates motions, motions bring change.

The spiral is the symbol of the vortex, and should be our symbol of understanding.

Not a water based prank

A real photo, apparently, from Tibet, of a monk aflame. If it's come to people lighting themselves on fire in protest, safe to say society has become overly authoritarian, and needs to relax, quite a bit.

Some serious stuff to light one's self on fire, right? Damn.

A Flaming Chainsaw of Justice

I LOVE the Betty White internet meme. I have no idea where it started or why, but now that it's got legs, I get it completely. GO MEME GO!

Also too: This is my kind of art. No idea the artist, but FSM damn I admire them greatly for spending time crafting this masterpiece. Just imagine a world where a terrible Betty White hunts down evildoers with her Flaming Chainsaw of Justice whilst riding her trusty John Ritter steed. Comically terrifying.

Model of the Universe

So, this here is a LITERAL model of the Universe. First, there's God - that's the hand, as in He has us all in His hands. Next, of course, is a turtle, as everything rests on a turtle, not only all the way down, but get this, all the way up too. And also, God loves turtles. Next is the Earth, here represented by a frog since Earth is made up of both land and water, and only frogs can live in both. Finally, there's an evil spider, representing wicked mankind. God hates spiders, as every child knows, and He hates Sin, and so since mankind was born into Sin because of that terrible Eve, we are unto spiders, hideous creatures scuttling about hiding from the light of Truth.

My goto guy Jonathan Edwards said it best:

The God that holds you over the pit of hell, much as one holds a spider, or some loathsome insect over the fire, abhors you, and is dreadfully provoked: his wrath towards you burns like fire; he looks upon you as worthy of nothing else, but to be cast into the fire; he is of purer eyes than to bear to have you in his sight; you are ten thousand times more abominable in his eyes, than the most hateful venomous serpent is in ours.

So wise up, wicked Sinners: We are but Spiders sitting on Frogs riding on Turtles, all held in the shaking hand of a terribly Angry God. Repent now!

Or soon. Whatevs. It doesn't matter, since the shit's all Predestined anyways. Am I right Calvin?

The Softer Side of Sears (1958)

Angels of the night, in red and pink flammable lace, bearing torches testifying their undying love for you. Till they burn up. Wait, did people still use candles as a regular lighting source in 1958? Inquiring minds want to know. This is a scan from the 1958 Sears Catalog. You remember that, right? Not 1958, mind you, but the Sears Catalog. I sure do - I'd spend countless hours reviewing the toy section, then the sports and camping pages. By the time I would have appreciated this

I had moved on to Cosmo and the "Sports" Illustrated swimsuit issue. Times change. Anyways, check out these ladies! The body type is still generally considered "ideal", save perhaps for the lack of breast implants. But now, consider this:

Hark! These girls were considered chubby in 1958. Also, "chubby" was a perfectly acceptable marketing word. Awesome! But behold how thin these girls are compared to the bloated fatbags that make up a goodly percentage of children (and adults) today. What's happened? Unbridled wealth? TV? Wal Mart? Republicans? Probably!

Fire and Light

Iceland is an amazing land for many reasons, two of which are:
1. Auroras. If you want to see lights in the sky and be reasonably close to civilization, Iceland is your destination of choice. The island is in the band where auroras are common - way up North. Sure, you could go to Northern Alaska, or Siberia, or Greenland, but you'd be out in the cold, harsh, wild. It would suck.
2. Volcanic activity. Other than maybe Hawaii, Iceland is the most volcanic land on Earth. Also home to many volcanic geysers and hot springs. The island sits smack dab atop the mid ocean ridge which marks the boundaries of two continental plates. The pressure of these plates colliding creates massive heat, forming land above the ridge, like Iceland. It's literally land being born upon the Earth anew.

So, here's some aurora and volcanoes.