Yesterday's sensation

Dinosaurs once ruled the Earth for millions of years. But look at them now - utterly defeated by mammals. There's life lessons here!

Dino War on Religion and other Pillars of Society

Behold this work of art! Encapsulating every 10 year old boy's internal storyspace. Dinosaurs at war, with aliens in the mix - somehow!

The dinosaur represents Freedom.

Obama's Goonsquad suffers calamitously in the Dino Uprising.

Also, Demand Full Atheism.

Praise The Feathered Raptor Lord!

Raptor Lord is a harsh God, but fair. He only eats when He's hungry. Which, admittedly, is often. But running the Universe  - including monitoring and influencing every single sporting event in the Universe in case one player/side is more fawning over Raptor Lord - is hard work!

Praise be unto Him. ROAR!

Dinolution

Science ruins everything, right? WRONG! Science makes everything awesome. Fur example, a large percentage (not all) of dinosaurs are now thought to have had feathers. Even the mighty T-Rex:

Stylish, fashionable, warm, and not remotely related to flight. Science thinks, for now, that feathers first evolved for warmth, and later evolved for use in flight. This evolution was carried forward by dinosaurs, who ultimately became birds.

Birds are the evolution of one branch of dinosaurs. All of them. Think of that the next time you feed the ducks.

QUACK!

Everything's Dinosaurs

Every bird you know is a dinosaur descendent. Turtles too. A shorter list would be "Who's not related to dinosaurs?"

Shit's dinotastic.

Idol Oven

Is it an idol to a terrible god? Is it an oven? It's both! Testament to the power of Sarah and a branding hook (the glasses). Done in mocking fashion, naturally. Read here.

It sure does cook up the heathens nice and tasty, with just the right amount of brimstone. Mmm-mmm! Sacrilicious! 

And of course as a photoshop - the true artistic medium of our time. Not mine! Can you guess the reference?

A hint: Hissssssss

Mechanical Spider Cars of the South

Imagine, if you will, a reality where dinosaurs were not wiped out by a terrible asteroid, but instead continued to prosper and evolve. After millions of years, one species got real smart, real fast, and then turned this world  - and space itself! - into their Kingdom, and all other creatures mere subordinates. Continue imagining, if you're still willing, that at the heights of their glory and power they became arrogant and crass, stupid drunk on their power, and they wiped themselves out. Alas!

Here's some ruins from their glorious but now departed culture. They liked mechanical spiders, according to scholars.

Also too: Nice pine trees!

Slouching Towards Bethlehem

A modern classic. You know that saying "I  don't know art, but I know what I like"? Well, I like this. A lot. And it's clearly art! Its all in there - click for big and take a gander at the wonder. It's our cartoon world - the very "real world" of Washington and Hollywood - the two capitals of modern fiction.

Anyone know the artist? I don't.

Another classic. I may have posted each of these before - sue me. They're great. This painting reminds me of the cliche but awesomely kick ass poem (one of the few in existence, believe me!) by William Butler Yeats, "The Second Coming":

TURNING and turning in the widening gyre
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.

Surely some revelation is at hand;
Surely the Second Coming is at hand.
The Second Coming! Hardly are those words out
When a vast image out of Spiritus Mundi
Troubles my sight: somewhere in sands of the desert
A shape with lion body and the head of a man,
A gaze blank and pitiless as the sun,
Is moving its slow thighs, while all about it
Reel shadows of the indignant desert birds.
The darkness drops again; but now I know
That twenty centuries of stony sleep
Were vexed to nightmare by a rocking cradle,
And what rough beast, its hour come round at last,
Slouches towards Bethlehem to be born?

Awesome, right? Like a horror movie. And I think it's sadly appropriate for our times. As with everything, there are forces that wax and wane, there are times when the forces of Progress are on the march, and times when the forces of Regression are, and most of the time there is an interplay between these forces. Right now, in America at least, there is great progress on the raw demographic level - we will be that Melting Pot we were all taught America is supposed to be. But clearly - watch Fox News for a few moments, or listen to Rush - the forces of Regression are fired up and have pitchforks and torches in hand.


The question is: Can we withstand them, outlast them, and defuse them? Only time will tell - I won't care (never do ["lack all conviction"]!), since from the mountaintop it's all pretty much the same. But I'm rooting for Progress nonetheless.


Also, too: Slouching Towards Bethlehem is the name of a great - perhaps the greatest - episode of Angel. If you've ever thought about watching the show but weren't sure it was for you, check this Season 4 episode out. If you don't like it, don't bother watching anything else.

Save Yourself

I first saw this funny little saying in this comic above, some time ago, which is really effective I think in its simplicity. Not sure about the text at the bottom, though I get the joke. But in searching for this picture on the WWW, I discovered this:

Same joke, better art, yet, not as funny.


It's an interesting case study in design. 

Also, too, the "Secret of Heroes": Either heroically dumb or heroically suicidal, or some of each. Otherwise, how could you ever risk your own life to save someone else's?

Raptor Jesus Buddy Christ Went Extinct For Your Sins

But he's back! So I guess it's all good. Of course, except for you sinful. Damn you!

Redshirt's Lament 1000th Post Jesus Dinosaur Spectacular!

I know we've all been waiting for this glorious day: Friday! Or, actually, my 1000th post. The first 300-500 were crap, but I've been on a roll since then. So, without further ado, here's a series of pictures of Jesus and Dinosaurs. NOTE! There is a different meme (to come) for Raptor Jesus.

 Or, did it?

 You see here Jesus - Master Tactician. Get the Magical Unicorns to focus on each other, then you come screaming in from out of nowhere upon your trusty Saurian steed.

 But as we all can learn from Jesus: Different tools for different jobs. You don't want to roll into a new city on a Tyrannosaurus, at least not the first time.

Or full on, "Hey! Prince of Peace here, riding a vegetarian, yo."

 I ain't very religious, but from my studies, one thing is clear: Jesus loves Dinosaurs. I wonder, though,  where the dinosaurs live in heaven? Mingled amongst everyone else, or do they get their own heaven, like hogs?

 Oh, and also too: It's fun to say "Jesus Penis".

Cephalopod's enough!

From the sexy....

 to the celebrated (Paul the Oracle's new monument in an aquarium in Germany - you remember Paul, don't you?!)...

 to the menu, Cephalopods are an important part of everyone's life!

In fact, they're amazing creatures, for many reasons, just a few of which I touch on, now:
1. Their camouflage abilities are without equal anywhere in the living world. Not only can some of these guys change their colors in real-time to match their surroundings, but they can change their shape and texture - to look exactly like a rock, for example. Imagine the sensors and brain power required to do that? Which leads me to
2. They're wicked smart. Right at the top of the list of "Most Intelligent Earth Creatures!" For example, I watched a science experiment with two Octopii in two separate cages, yet each could see the other. One octopus was then prompted to navigate a puzzle in order to obtain the treat inside, while the other octopus could watch. It would take some time for the first octopus to figure the puzzle out, but the second one would always solve it much, much faster. Replace the octopii and try again, and then again, then again, and finally, you must conclude: Octopus can learn complex tasks by watching.

This is an amazingly powerful skill that might seem simple to you and I, but is really revolutionary.

And the list goes on. Cephalopod's as a group are one of the most intelligent lifeforms on the planet, and I will not be surprised when our AI loving human relations begin molding AI on cephalopod forms, rather than human. In many ways, they are more advanced on a variety of fronts.

Regardless, won't you take a moment today, step back, and think of the wonders of our cephalopod cousins?

You know the birds will be doing so - yumyum!

Two in the Bush (One Hand Clapping)

Now that you know birds are really just modern dinosaurs...

Tokyo, Japan. This giant Gull has telepathically seized control over an ultramodern Japanese warship.

Sydney, Australia. This assassin bird was spotted outside a secured UN meeting. He was scared away before completing his mission.

 Dallas, Texas. Annual "Large Armed Parakeet Rodeo". Parakeets here are known to arm wrestle for hours on end, for no good reason.

It's all in good laughs. For now. But never forget: These are dinosaurs you're laughing at.  Don't you ever forget that, by gum.

Surfin' Bird

Have you heard? I think I have posted this pic before, and I try never to repeat, but! I do so intentionally since I need it to ask the question: Is this picture above of the same birds as this?

Maybe, maybe not. I'm voting a qualified yeah. Also too: Check out the face on big bird here. Scary! Reminds me that birds come from dinosaurs, and dinosaurs were scary lifeforms - scary as in: eat your face off if given half a chance. Which I can respect as a part of the predator - prey cycle. I'd just not rather be on the prey side, if you dig.

Is that common knowledge now, or controversial? That birds evolved from the same line as dinosaurs? And I mean among rational people, not the Heebie Jeebies. The similarities are overwhelming proof in my opinion - such as egg laying, lung structure, skeletal structure, etc. Think of a giant ostrich and you can easily make a leap to small dinosaur.

Remember this the next time you come upon a swarm of pigeons. Beware!

A Dramatic Reconstruction of the Fantasy Civil War

We've established our premise - note the influence of the Golden Days of 2002/2003!

 Making progress.

 Yes! More of this! Do it for America! I mean the Confederacy!

 What's this?! Counterattack?!?!?! With a katana?

Ha! How do you like this?! I have taken your breeches! Long Live the South! Long live the... Wait!

Oh Noes! It's the 20th of Maine with their unstoppable and highly educated leader Joshua Chamberlain! We're doomed! How shall we recover from this total defeat?

 I got it! New marketing campaign! Yee-haw! The South shall rise again!!!

Raptor Jesus Hungers for your Sins

He suffered for YOUR sins. He also worked up a mighty appetite while doing so.

Don't you want to get closer to Raptor Jesus?

Unless you're Muslim, of course - it's all good. You get your own terrible lizard. Everyone does!


Also: This Raptor Jesus thing is big on the internet. Proving for the billionth time why I love these tubes so.

It's On

It is SO on. Don't forget - we're soaking in it.

Whatever It, is.

The Great Bea Yond

Bea Arthur is a great hero to many, apparently. For deeds such as depicted here, I assume. Dino rasslin'.

Touched by The Fonz

Fonzie magic was good, but not as good as Dino-Fonzie magic.

Dinosaur War of Northern Aggression

If only Johnny Reb had some good ole Alabama T-Rex's to take care of them devil Sherman's boys. Damn shame.