You Oort to Know

The Oort cloud is a sphere of ice and rock and lots of other frozen stuff that marks the limit of our Sun's gravitational pull. It is hypothesized that comets come from the Oort cloud, getting knocked out of it in any number of ways, and then getting drawn in towards the Sun (and it is likely Earth's oceans came from Comets - thus, the Oort cloud). It is also HUGE - another lesson, folks: Everything's bigger than you can imagine. The Oort cloud represents the end of our Solar System - our home - and it stretches out to 1 light year in a circle around the sun. For perspective, our nearest stellar neighbor, Proxima Centauri, is 4 light years from the Sun. Here's another picture that might give you a sense of the scale:

As you can see, what we traditionally think of as the Solar System - the planets in their orbits - is really, really small compared to what is actually our Solar System - the Oort Cloud and everything within it. So much bigger, in fact, that there's a growing realization there might be other planetoids, like Pluto, hiding out there, hitherto undetected. One such new plaentoid was found recently, named Sedna:

Read the above picture from upper left (inner solar system) to upper right (outer solar system, with Sedna indicated), down to lower right (Sedna's orbit as compared to Neptune and the Gang) than lower left (Sedna's orbit as compared to the Oort Cloud), each frame encompassing the previous. 


If I've done my job, this should all remind you of something, but if not, check back in in a few days - payoff's a'coming.

Moons of Another Mother

I know I've expressed my love of Moons before - many times - but gosh darn they're fascinating. In many ways, the moons of our solar system are far more interesting than the planets. More to choose from, for starters! Jupiter and Saturn are the Big Momma's when it comes to moons in our sector,  as they have so many, and each is different than the next.

And I know I've waxed poetic about my favorite spacecraft of all - Cassini. Currently in orbit around Saturn, snapping sweet shots left and right. Like the one above - an actual photo, not a shop. Can you believe it! It's so beautiful - the rings of Saturn, with Dione and Rhea above. Here's another pic of the same two moons, not as dramatic though:

 Incredible, yes? And the wonders don't stop. Here's Mimas (I one day hope to drink a mimosa around Mimas), or, The Death Star Moon:

 It is a Moon! Here's Mimas framed against the rings (Wallpaper size):

 And finally, as I've mentioned before, my favorite moon, Titan. The label for this photo says that's Tethys behind it, but it sure does look like Mimas to me. You can decide for yourself:

Another piece of held wisdom: Earth is the water planet. Not true at all. In comparison not only to the big planets past Mars, but also to many of their Moons (like Enceladus), the Earth is a mostly dry rock. The only reason it appears so wet is water can exist on the surface in liquid form, whereas out there, it's in ice at the surface, and most likely liquid deep below. Point being, all the water we could ever need, all the minerals and materials we could ever need, is out there, waiting. Will we get to it?


The Obelisk can get bent, if that's your answer, by the way.

Luna Rules

One big ass picture of our Moon, or as you might call her by her future name, Luna. Click for big, and if you really want to see a HUGE version of this picture, go here and zoom away.

There's a lot of new information about our Universe these days, that might counter what you thought was established information. For instance, space is not a vacuum! Also, the Moon is rich in water, and in fact would be a fine next step for humanity, in theory. Check out this topo map, which shows likely sources of water (underground - blues and purples):

 The first picture above, and the link, are a result of a recent effort of patching together thousands of high def photos into one image, images taken from another of man's spacecraft, the Lunar Reconnaissance Orbiter. Here's some detail shots from the same series:

 Check it out - sunset on Luna.

 There's a bridge down there!

 A rather big pit - an ideal location for a base.

Living on Luna is not going to happen in the near term - 50 years? 100? But eventually, as long as we don't wipe ourselves out, we'll make it, no doubt in order to strip mine it - that's why we're here, after all: To consume (and reformulate).

It's a big galaxy though, and there's plenty of stuff we can use up and throw away before we have any problems. Go up, young men!

Glory Days

Here's a picture of Neil Armstrong, after just landing on the Moon. Can you imagine? You've just entered humanity's history books, forever, as part of one of the greatest achievements of mankind.


Alas! I fear we as a species have lost the stomach for this kind of exploration. The Bureaucrats are in charge now, along with the money men. Thesis: Given all the same technological conditions of 1963, but with today's political environment, I would hazard a 0% chance of repeating this historic act. For, indeed, it was incredibly risky, and could have easily failed. Fun fact to know and share - when the moon missions were flying regularly, there was a massive solar storm that hit the moon and would have killed anyone there, but luckily, Apollo was in between missions.


But again, that poison well....


So, let's focus on the cool: Descent of the Eagle:

Right in the middle is the capsule heading for a touch-down.

And touch-down - look closely in the middle and you'll see Apollo 11. Click for big.
And finally, a thing of beauty, as always, perspective on a grand scale - Earthrise:

Shadow in Space

I'm sure not many care, but this is the last voyage of the Starship Discovery, pictured above from last week, with the ISS casting a shadow from on high.

In many ways, the Space Shuttle is an apt metaphor for America over the past 50 years. To wit, born in a time of rapid advancement and progress (60's), milked for all it was worth by Regan and minions who offered nothing in return, and then left to meekly die because we've run out of money in the 21st century.

Summarized: With the rise of the Wingnuts, all long term planning/investment went out the window, and all efforts are made towards short term political gains, increasing wealth for you and yours, and making sure the little guys gets it in both ends. America! All while proclaiming one's great Patriotism.

We've got no replacement spaceship, and instead we're praying the private sector can come through. They might be able to, but even if they do, it's going to take awhile. And thus, in a weirdly poetic circle, Americans will now depend on Russians to get into space. USA! USA! Thanks again, Ronnie.

But alas! I did not want to touch that poison, for too long. Here's some neat-o shots of the ISS and the Space Shuttle. This first picture is from 2007, care of Phil Plait:

 That's the ISS and Space Shuttle shooting across the heavens, very close to each other. This next pic is from the current mission, and is awesome, as it was taken from earth:

 Click for big, as always.


Alas, it won't be till the Chinese make some real headway in space till America gets back in the game, because then the Redneck Wingnuts will say it's for defense, and the golden flow of money will commence. C'mon new Cold War (Chinese Space Version)!

Hawking in Spaaaaaaaaace

Er, well, not quite. Zero G though! This is NASA's "Vomit Comet", a modified plane that goes wicked high, then executes a series of dips, within which, for a few minutes, the passengers experience Zero G (good Gangsta name!) and practice whatever they are supposed to be practicing.

Also, as a sign of how wonderful mankind can be, I give you Lego Hawking:

Pretty good, right? And as a sign of how even more wonderful people can be, I give you:

 Hawking in Spaaaaace!

And finally, as a sign of how terrible people can be, I give you some prototype new airplane seats one global carrier is testing whether to deploy or not. For realz!

In the future, who'll need leg room, amirite?

Genetic Memories of Manhood Lost

I've always been puzzled by deer heads hung on a wall, or any other animal. As a child, they were terrifying. As a teenager they were a joke. As an adult (ha!) I realize they are a symbol, a connection to a forgotten past, but a past in which our species spent by far the most time: Hunting and gathering. Where a man was a man and it was eat or be eaten.

Cultural context adds to it - the hunting lodge, the camp, the sanctuary of men, away from women and their womanly concerns. The giant moose head hung by the roaring fireplace signifies your prowess as a hunter, or here, as someone rich enough to have a camp with a big fireplace and a giant moose head. Impress the other males, signify your position in the tribe. Yadda yadda.

It made sense for a dude circa 12000BCE; for a lawyer in 2011 from NYC at his retreat in the country? Symbolic to the core, but isn't that pretty much any of us have nowadays? Symbols? As none of us - or an exceptionally small percentage - do anything to actually deliver food, shelter, defense, etc, i.e. those things that once defined every man, woman and child. But for us, we 21st century foxes, nothing is real, all is abstract, and dare I say, absurd.

This picture, yeah?

We Are Defined by What We Kill

Hey Beauford! What say me and Jimmy Bob pose on this here giant hill of buffalo skulls and you snap one of them new fangled flash pictures?

Have you heard about this? Read about this? The wanton killing of buffalo in the American west in the late 1800's? Vacation train rides you could take where you'd just be poppin' off out the window, cold killin' buffalo for kicks. Fun for the whole family! And for why? No good reason really, just cause the buffalo were there, so easy for the killin' - they were practically asking for it.

Now, compare that mindset, just some 100 years old, with a comparable attitude today - for example, there are many re-population efforts of buffalo going on across the west. 

Progress! Right? It seems undeniable, and this is but one example. For it's true: You are defined by what you kill, and each and everyone of us MUST kill in order to live - this is in fact a definition of life, in my opinion: To kill. For fuel, of course, but killing is killing. Everything alive kills, and so the question is: Do you have a choice in this?

Yes, we humans clearly do. And so we have all kinds of weird diets, as expressions of our humanity. It's quite wonderful, I think, and presages even greater progress in the future.

And this is but one area of progress. We are becoming environmentally aware; equality is a real fact, and a growing reality across the world; racism and bigotry are battled across the globe. I could go on, but I hope you see, despite the seeming insanity of American politics and how that shapes the entire Earth, we are all - collectively! - making great progress in advancing a progressive attitude for all humanity. Respecting each other and the world we inhabit, this is our collective future. Not the distrust and rapaciousness of the past.

There will be setbacks, and those that refuse to go along. Some of these people/groups are quite powerful and will do everything they can to thwart our common success, but they are few, and ever dwindling, and if we can avoid a destruction event, the forces of progress will simply overwhelm such conservative roadblocks.

The future is ours! So remain strong in the face of the Insanity and Lies launched by the rear guard Morans of the American Right. Their time is over, and we are but witnessing the death throes.

And yes, we can define ourselves by killing regressive attitudes, like slavery, cannibalism, ritual mutilations, etc. 

What's heartening is this energy of progress is relatively new, born from the hippies, I would think. And never forget one of the first effective symbols of this new awareness:

 Please don't litter. Seriously. You'll make this dude cry. You don't want to do that, do you?

We Are Defined by What We Throw Away

Since I first entertained apocalyptic notions (thank you Terminator!), I've long held this "dual thought" - I define "Dual Thought" as entertaining two distinct notions about the same thing, and each is in balance with the other. For an example, ever visit an area, get an impression of it, then actually move there some time after? Guaranteed you will have two (at least) distinct impressions of the place, each in harmony with the other because they are filed by time, but the actual impressions might be completely contradictory.

Time. And so, since it dawned on me that all of this could end, like, right this minute, I've held two (at least) distinctive time perspectives on everything: The Now, and the Then. The Then is the End, and it's filled with killer robots and smoking craters and any and all sorts of Mayan doomsayings come to life; the Now is the Now. Yeah?


And so, looking at the picture above - gosh! Don't the 70's look pretty? And when we're being hunted down by Kilbots in the End Times to come, won't the trash we so casually throw away now turn miraculous, then? That we could simply throw out a can, rather than re-use it, will seem like the height of foolish luxury. What Golden Imperial times we lived in, we'll say, in between picking lice out of a friend's hair for supper.


Appreciate it while you can!

in America

Look at this! Just cold throwin' out an oversized novelty check for 25 Large. Dayum! Someone's got some very, very deep pockets to just chuck this - I'm talking Paul Bunyan sized pockets here.


But I guess it does serve to confirm the mythical notion of "in America...". For instance, "The streets are paved with gold!". For Gold, here, read: Oversized Novelty Checks. But you get the point, yeah?


Also too: I've long held the dream of being paid solely in oversized novelty checks. When I walked into the bank on payday, people would pay attention, dang nab it! So to see such wanton waste is a bit poignant for me. I hope for you, too.

The Morning After

Alas! What was shiny and bright in the night has turned to discarded trash in the day. But I still love you, Chairry (though to be honest I was more of a Magic Screen man myself).


I'm serious too - are you familiar with your different "Day" and "Night" selves? Or am I crazy? Or, all of the above?

(I Think I Was In) Heaven

It's a Pope Party Y'all! 

But seriously, one of my favorite sub-sub-sub-sub topics of interest is the general category of "Purported Holy Man Acts Hypocritically". Example: Ted Haggard. There are many, many others.


Not to say John Paul here did anything bad - other than the systematic cover up of institutionalized pedophilia and rape! - but, you know: Funny photo.

Oh and also too: Sorry for the long absence. I was in New Gondolin - I need to get me some Sully Minions or something, or some kind of bot, to keep up in my absences. For I know the Interwebs hunger for more stupid pictures and related stupid comments. Don't we all?

Because we can (must)

Not my drawing, and no idea who's - if it's yours, please step up and claim it, for it is magnificent.  If I could draw - and it certainly is a talent I lack - I'd draw all sorts of wonderful monstrosities - and why not? For, I could, and if you can, I posit, you must. Why else do you have the ability?


To sing, to write, to fight, to draw, some are blessed/curse with a need to express, and the best, I find, are those mated with a warped mind. Only from the outside do we all advance. And thus, the beauty of a horse making out with a duck. 


Symbolically, of course. This edge, this "warpedness", is what allows us hoo-mons to be so fantastically inventive. And invention is what separates us from all other life on Earth, and possibly for some distance in the stellar neighborhood.

No Cats, No Steeples

Oh wait, actually: Just the opposite. And just so I'm clear, here:

North Adam Steeplecats RULE!


Also, too: God bless a world where a man can make a million dollars by simply hosting a website where other people intentionally misspell words on a picture. LOLcats indeed.

Haute Dogs

Anything for a pun. Really - I sometimes work for days in order to get to a certain picture. Crazy like that! I believe (it's been a while since I got this one) this is an actual dog restaurant in - where else? - NEW YORK CITY! I like the concept on many levels: 1. Dog is man's best friend. Don't they deserve a night out? 2. Supply and demand - if someone wants to pay for it, why not? 3. Add to the list of "thing's I'll remember fondly/ruefully after the apocalypse". Covered in soot, eating pine cones, I'll think to myself "self, remember when we were so grand as to have dog diners?"


Good times (for now)!

The Last Parody

My gods, the internet.... it's full of "The Last Supper" parodies. Everyone's got one - any TV show worth its salt, clowns, dogs (as you see a fine example here), cartoon characters, Star Wars.... but shockingly, in the 3 minutes of research I've performed, no Star Trek. Would Kirk be in the Jesus role, with Kaaaaaaaaaahn to his right? Or Picard, with Q all querulous? Hmm. Will have to consult the Trek Hive Mind. If you know of an existing Trek Last Supper parody, hit me.


And also too: I'm no religious type person, but I've read all the so called holy books and studied most of the art, for no other reason than to be well versed in parody material. Any writer/artist who would mock something must know what it is they're mocking. That is, if they want to be good at it.


You can only destroy what you truly understand.

When we lost the clowns

I don't remember a time when clowns were not considered scary, but scary in a "oh, you're terrified of clowns too?!" kinda way, you know? Like we're all suffering this fear of clowns in secret, all pretending to find them funny, still hiring them for our children's birthday parties, knowing full well we're terrifying them too.

But maybe it's just my secret shame. A GIS search for "scary clown" has no shortage of results. Now, I assume way back in the yonder, clowns were genuinely considered "fun". What changed? I suspect a large part of it is this guy:

John Wayne Gacy - the original killer clown. Quite a scary individual, and he might be the source for all this fear, for the loss of the clowns. Others jumped on the bandwagon - prime among them in my mind Stephen King's "Pennywise". And then once a meme enters the common consciousness, it takes off and lives a life of its own, such that we could all hold the idea and have no idea where it came from.  This is an autographed John Wayne Gacy picture, apparently.

Will there be a Clown Messiah, to redeem them all?

 I doubt it.

Also too:

All that said, I do recommend the movie "Shakes the Clown", but that's only because it's uber-ironic.

Everything's ironic

I hope whomever crafted these sad little clown cactus holders was intentional - otherwise? Idiot? Most naive person in existence? Sexless alien from N'argua'allaX 7? Church lady in a bubble? 


And who would put one of these in their homes? Unironically, of course. 


Ironically? Anything's possible.


Also, too: Can you overuse a question mark, really? Isn't it the sign of a good conversationalist to ask questions? Isn't it fun to end statements with an uplifted, French-like "yes"? Or "no?", or "Is it not so?" Well, huh?

Once Seen, Never Unseen

Well, the time has come, and I finally have a chance to use these pictures. As I said earlier, take it from me: Look no further than here. I trust you can get the gist of "goat...se" from these homages, yes? Because it surely is true: Once seen, never unseen. Anyways, above! A single mug in pre-production, and below, a batch ready for sale (not my creations, of course):

Pretty awesome in a 21st century post-modern ultra-ironic hipster way. Pretty awesome in lots of ways, but I'm not sure I'd drink out of one.

Speaking of irony:

And finally, a photoshop that has entered the realm of your Aunt's FW:FW:FW:FW email chains, Godse:

Mysterious ways indeed, ma'am.

It Ain't Easy

Unlike say, President of the USA (*Cough* W.), Pimp is a position you have to earn. It's not handed to you, and you don't keep it by title - everyday is a challenge. And you've got to work your way up the pimp ladder.

Whatever it takes. Have you heard of goatse? If yes, my condolences. If not, I tell you truly: Look no further than here. I'll safely guide you through it. And, isn't context hilarious? This is just a puppet, right?

Also too:

Lady Gaga Kermit Coat. She's a star!

Gone Green

More awesome art! Given an unlimited checkbook, I would stock my tree-house mansion with all manner of sci-fi and pop culture art. I mean, look at this painting! It's genius. Entitled "Vina The Longing" by an artist named I Samaras. It might be for sale. 

And if you've got a few hours to spare, go ahead and ask the great GIS about  "Star Trek Paintings". It's fascinating.

Van Gorn

Since exoplanets are all the rage these days (more to come), then let's follow what I consider a logical conclusion: That life is fairly common out there, and some small percentage of it is smart. Smart enough for clothes, for art. And given that the same physical laws apply everywhere, then planets of similar size and distance from their star, with similar chemical composition, with water, etc, will likely evolve fairly common lifeforms as here on Earth - they'll eat, reproduce, try and maximize resources, and die. Certain mechanical designs will play out in completely independent environments - how alien would alien ocean life forms look, for example? There's only so many ways to swim, or navigate on land. Maybe they have 4 arms instead of two, or tentacles instead of hands, but I don't think the differences will be that extreme - like, for counter example, a life form made of energy, or gas, or some kind of ooze, etc.


And thus, to conclude: The Gorn. Reptile-like alien lifeforms. And why not? Way back when, a smart alien lizard learns to really exploit a niche, swells in numbers, evolutionary pressures produce ever refined hunting techniques leading to tools, to fire, to technology in all its forms. There's nothing at all which says one life form or another could not become dominant in a given environment. For example, perhaps ocean worlds have super intelligent dolphin like aliens. Who knows!


The sky is literally the limit - and by sky, I mean everything.